How Do I Drive This Thing?
by StatsGrandma57
Summary: Inspired by the Father's Day challenge at HanLeiaFanficWritersBlog, I went on to do another story. This is a story of Han and Jaina having some serious quality time together. Chapter 9 and 10 are now up and that completes this story. More to come, I'm in the Caribbean and if it ever stops raining, I might get outside :)
1. Chapter 1

HOW DO I DRIVE THIS THING?

(Han)

I've got a lot of deliveries to make and not a lot of time to make them in. Fortunately, they're to the Core Worlds and the Inner Rim, but it's going to take me a good ten days to accomplish, assuming all goes well, which is something of an if. The _Falcon_ is a good ship, but like all ladies, she has her off moments.

School shuts down for the hottest part of the seasons; we have hot weather for about half the year and incredibly hot weather for a quarter of it. The remainder is wet, windy and cold. We're in the season I call 'as hot as possible without being on Tatooine.'

Chewie and I normally fly these jobs together, but he had to race home to Kashyyyk, a problem with Lumpy. I didn't ask because there's no need to. It's gotta be serious for Chewie to bolt like that. I'd have let him take the _Falcon_ except that we'd accepted all this work.

Jaina's been helping me get my old girl ready for the trip. She's twelve, and I'm kind of surprised she still helps me.

"Thanks for the help - owww!" She was handing me a hydrospanner and it fell on my head when I failed to grab it.

"You okay, Daddy?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine. Just need to get out of here by tomorrow early."

"I hope Uncle Chewie's okay."

"I think Uncle Chewie is fine. It's Lumpy you should worry about."

"Yeah, I know that's why he went."

I'm about to say, I didn't discuss that with you, but she has her ways of figuring me out, and this puts me at a strong strategic disadvantage.

"I could come with you," Jaina volunteers.

"Delivering merchandise?"

"Well, it's not scary, is it?"

"Not nowadays." For the most part, it's pretty smooth flying these years.

"Mom said you did a lot of dangerous missions for the Alliance."

"Let's just say that fighting off the Imps and various and sundry less than lovable characters made runs a lot more hazardous."

"I can come with you. I could even help you unpack."

"Honey, where I'm going, they have their crews to unpack the ship. I'm getting kind of old for that."

"I could still help. I can pilot the ship."

My stomach has gotten caught in my throat. I've let Jaina pilot a few times, and each time, I've had to restrain myself from grabbing the controls away frome her and/or not vomit. I'm not a dainty driver myself, but she's inexperienced, and she's not familiar with what what you do in various emergency situations. I know that becoming a pilot is her dream, and she has the raw ability, but it could be a far less efficient operation.

"Don't you have friends you like hanging out with?"

Jaina rolls her eyes just like her mom does. "All they wanna talk about is boys. And makeup. They're both boring."

Good, she's not all about boys yet. I breathe a little easier.

"Lemme tell you that boys get more boring, not less."

"I know. You used to be cool when you were a pirate."

"I deeply appreciate that," I tell her sarcastically.

"Besides, I miss you when you're gone."

I suddenly feel like a pat of butter in a hot pan, trying to remain solid.

"And if I'm gonna be a great pilot, I gotta practice."

"True. But you might do better with someone who's impartial."

"Whaddya mean?"

"Someone who's not worried about losing life and limb in the process."

"What, you think I'd crash your precious _Falcon_? C'mon, Daddy, no way!"

I have a feeling I'm going to be defeated in very short order.

"Pleeeeeeeeeeeeassssse?" She's giving me the eyes her mom makes when she's trying to get me to agree to something. I am helpless against this.

Fortunately, I have a higher authority I can appeal to, namely, Leia. "I'll talk to Mom."

"Oh thank you thank you!" She comes down, gives me a big hug, and says, "Daddy, you're the best!"

"Uh-huh. All right, let's get back to work."

01123581321345589144233377610987

Dinner's done, the older three kids are out playing, and miraculously, Jarik is sound asleep. He's always more worn out in the hot months. I think some of it may be due to the fact that he has three older siblings to entertain him.

"Jaina wants to go on this shipping run with me," I tell Leia.

"Does she know that there's nothing glamorous about deliveries?"

"No. I tried to tell her, but you know her, when she gets something in her head - "

"I'm very well acquainted with this aspect of her," Leia says, and she's laughing.

"She's just like you that way."

Leia explodes into laughter. I fail to see the humor in this.

"What?" I ask her.

"Han, you are the most stubborn man in the universe, and you say she gets it from me?" Leia finds this hilarious.

"I thought she just got my good looks and charming personality."

Leia is laughing so hard she has to grab a glass of water. "You were saying about taking Jaina on a delivery run."

"Ten days of it, if we're lucky and nothing blows on the _Falcon_."

Fortunately, Leia says nothing. She does not diss my ship. She knows how often it's saved our asses.

"Well, why not? It's good experience for her."

"And may be the death of me."

"Han, time has established that you are eminently not killable."

"Is that even a word? She gives me heart attacks," I tell her.

"What are you going to do when she discovers boys?"

"That'll never happen. Ever!"

"Well, why don't you take her? You're used to flying with Chewie, who at least gives you someone to talk to. He's not here, and I do hope things are all right by him. You and Jaina have fun together. Think about it."

"You know, I'm getting the feeling that you and Jaina are in cahoots to torment me."

"I don't have to be in cahoots with Jaina to torment you," she says blandly, a smile on her face. "I can do it on my own. Take her, Han, and let her have a shot. I wouldn't leave her unsupervised - "

"Don't even say it!"

" - but you've said yourself that she's got the talent, and the drive."

"Just not the ability. Yet."

"And how is she supposed to acquire that skill?"

I sigh. "I really hate it when you're so sensible." Leia laughs again. She is totally amused by this. I had no idea I was so entertaining.

"There's also the matter of what, well, what happens when we're in port."

"You usually sleep on the _Falcon._"

"Yeah, but you know if anyone's around I go drinking with 'em, play a little sabacc. I mean, not that I have to, sometimes nobody's around - "

"Let her try her wings," Leia says to me. "I think you could have some great father-daughter bonding time. And, you wouldn't have to listen to us duking it out." Mothers and daughters are complicated as hell. I don't understand it and I doubt I ever will.

I stare at her. "Let me make sure I understand this. You think my taking her on deliveries is a good idea."

"I do."

Once again, I have been defeated by both of the women in my life. Any other conclusion would have been delusional.

01123581321345589144233377610987

I knock on Jaina's door. I knock louder. No response. Probably playing her music impossibly loud. I open the door.

She glares at me. "Daddy, don't you knock?"

"I do. You just don't hear me. You seem to want to become prematurely deaf. Anyway, I talked to your mom."

"And?"

"She thinks you should go with me."

Her sullen mood changes in a terasecond. "Yay! Daddy, you're the best!" She gives me a huge hug.

"Better get packing, sweetie. We're off at 0700."

Let's see what she thinks of me after we've been racing about the galaxy for a few days. Somehow, I may once again be knocked off the Galaxy's Greatest Dad pedestal.

01123581321345589144233377610987

(Leia)

I never look forward to Han's cargo runs. But there are two good parts: the night before he leaves and the night he comes home. No matter how busy or tired we are, we do our best to make sure to keep that time for us alone.

Han's reading Jarik 'The Little Lost Bantha Cub.' Yes, it was the favorite of the older kids as well. But Han reads it as if it was the first time he ever did. Our youngest child is curled up on Han's lap, listening to his father's soothing voice. I smile at how lucky I am to have a husband who's such a great father.

Jaina is now racing about trying to get her clothes to the valet as she attempts to match outfits. She's not what you'd call a clothes fanatic, but she is very specific about what goes with what, and no variations on a theme should be suggested, lest the wrath of a twelve year old be visited upon you. She's thrilled to death that her father's going to take her on a delivery run.

I've been on delivery runs with Han, both back during the Rebellion (when we were shot at constantly) and in peacetime (where the height of excitement is an evening in Chalmun's Spaceport Cantina). Let's just say that Han and I entertained each other as best we could in a small space, mostly without clothing, at least in between trying to repair the hyperdrive.

Jarik is asleep by the time the story ends and he takes our little guy to his crib. We both kiss him good night. He's such a cute little one.

"How long do we have before Jacen and Anakin have to be home?" Han asks me, his eyes full of mischief.

"About two hours." Yes, they are out in the streets with their friends, playing various games that are accompanied by a great deal of noise.

"I think two hours is enough."

"And, we have a door that locks."

"Say no more."


	2. Chapter 2

HOW DO I DRIVE THIS THING?

Chapter 2

(Han)

"C'mon, sweetie," I call to Jaina. She's fast asleep. I walk in and nudge her, and she shoves me away.

"What time's it?"

"It's 0430. Time to go."

"You said we were leaving at 0700."

"No, that's when we take off."

"But Daddy, it's the middle of the night!"

"If you're not ready when I am, I leave without you." We have to do preflight and make sure everything is in working order. I wasn't very good about doing it in my younger days, mostly because the question of maintaing my ass was at stake, but now that I've got kids and I'm not operating a criminal enterprise, I'm more cautious. Not a lot more. Just a little.

"Just ten more minutes? Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesse?"

"I'm leaving in 15. You figure it out."

01123581321345589144233377610987

Amazingly, she's ready by the time we have to go. She's still groggy, but if she's going to be a pilot, she's going to have to get used to waking up at horrible hours.

"Can we get kaf?" Is the first thing she asks me as we get on to the automated open car monorail. There are kaf bars littering the view everywhere, but we're on a schedule and Jaina's going to have to figure out in a hurry that the one she's on is mine.

"I'll make some." Leia got me an awesome kaf brewer for Winter Fete, and it lives on the _Falcon_.

"Do you have anything to put in it?"

"I've got sweetener and cream."

"That's it?" She looks horrified.

"What else do you need?"

"Well, like flavor syrups."

"Sorry, sweetie, we only drink the real thing aboard the _Falcon._"

"Can we stop and get some syrup?"

"Delivering goods is something you have a schedule for, and if you're late, it costs you money. We're on time but barely. So we're gonna need to hustle. Remember what I taught you about preflight checks?"

"You'll tell me if I screw up, I'm sure." She dozes off till we reach the docking bay, and I have to wake her up.

"C'mon, let's move, sweetie."

She slings her duffel over her shoulder. It's huge.

"How much did you bring?" I ask her.

"You said ten days. So ten days plus two extra."

"I have a portable valet."

"If you wanna smell gross during the flight, just remember I'm not Chewie."

"Hey, I clean up nicely. Your mom says so."

The two walked over to the _Falcon_, sitting there as if awaiting their presence.

"You don't believe in the Force, do you, Daddy?"

"That's not a question I can answer without a lot more kaf, which I'm gonna put on. Now, what's the first thing we do on a preflight check?"

"Make sure the pilot's awake?"

"That's true." I put the kaf on.

"And not stoned?"

"That, too."

"Or sick."

"Not so far." This may change once I let Jaina have the controls. "Now what?"

"We have to get the info about our first stop."

"What kind of info?"

"Where we're gonna land. What sort of stuff we have along the way."

"Such as?"

"Meteor showers. Gravity wells. Solar storms. Stuff like that."

"What's our first port of call?"

"I dunno! You didn't tell me!"

Oh. Right. "We're going to Corellia. Our first stop is the capital planet. We also have to hit Tralus and Drall."

"What about Selonia and Talus?"

"Not this time." I rarely have to hit all of the Five Brothers.

"How come you never took us to Corellia?"

"Why?" I can't for the life of me think of why I'd want to do more than drop off shipments.

"'Cause that's where you're from."

"I was born there. My life wasn't very good there, and I'd prefer to not to stay a minute longer than I have to." My homeworld was pretty damn cruel to me. I don't really have fond memories of it.

"At least you have your homeworld. Mom doesn't."

"I know. But her life was good on Alderaan. Mine on Corellia was pretty much a bust. Now what?"

"Look at the landing diagrams?"

"You're doing pretty well for a kid who hasn't had four cups of kaf. What else?"

"Get landing permits?"

"Yeah, but we need other things first."

"What you have to do to get into orbit? See if there's bad weather planetside?"

"That's important."

"Communications?"

"What kind?"

"Where you're gonna land. What you have to land on."

"I think we're good there. Now, what about the mechanics of the _Falcon_?

"Make sure there's enough fuel."

"Okay."

"Find out where you can get refueled?"

"We've got solid fuel, and we're good for most of the trip, but yeah, always good to know where you can get refueled."

"Make sure all the engines fire?"

"Keep going."

"Test for gas and solid fuel leaks?"

"We need to do that one more time."

"We just did it last night!"

"And we're going to do it again."

"Get the transponder code?"

"Yep."

"All right, you get in touch with traffic control and let them know our route, and where we're supposed to take off."

"Me?"

"Sure."

"They'll ask for ID, right?"

"You know that."

"Okay."

"Open a channel for TC, identify the ship and the captain and crew, and get the transponder setting."

I've gotta give it to her. She's remembered what I've told her pretty well. She reaches TC and identifies the ship correctly. I recognize the mission controller and laugh.

"Jaina Solo, it's a pleasure. Is your useless father around?"

"He's right here."

"If it isn't Dren Selmer. How are you, loser?" We've known each other for a very long time.

"I see that the next generation of pilots is about to unseat you. How's Leia?"

"She's busy, as always."

"I still think it's a miracle she married you."

"Me, too. Got our transponder signal?"

"2320. Secondary is 5025." Secondary's for hijackings. I've been hijacked by Imperials, and it's gotta be the scariest thing out there. Give me engine failure any day. "Clearance in 4 minutes."

"Thanks, idiot."

"You're welcome, you dick." We both laugh. I know that she's not supposed to hear me talk like this, but somehow, I don't think Jaina's missed much.

"Happy landings. Stand by for signal. Be safe."

"How'd I do, Daddy?"

I have to say I'm fairly impressed. She's paid attention to what I have to say, which is something of a miracle. Of course, that anyone pays attention to me at all is somewhat unbelievable. "You did good, little princess."

"Dad, Mom's the princess."

"She's my princess, you're my little princess. Deal with it." I give her a quick hug. "You can go back and sleep in the bunk if you're tired.

"No, just some kaf. I don't wanna miss any of this!" Excitement has overtaken sleepiness.

"Good. You're taking off." Yes, I did make adjustments to the leg wells for her to be able to reach the foot controls. They're removable because my copilots are drastically different heights. You work with what you have.

"I am? Cool." I walk back and grab two mugs of kaf and set it in her cupholder. That's one of the first things I added to the old girl. Nowadays cupholders come standard on all ships.

"Okay, time to fire her up," I tell Jaina. "We've got two minutes unless we get other instructions. Did you put in the trajectory?"

"Yup."

"Recite it back to me."

"Five - one - four."

"So far, you're doing fine." Of course, we're not even off the ground yet. Takeoff and landing are the two most dangerous times in flying, unless you've got an army of Imperial TIE fighters and destroyers chasing you. I'm not anticipating any of that.

She looks a little nervous, but I'll confess that I was terrified the first few times I swoop raced. It's illegal now, seeing as it's classified as bloodsport (casualties were not only expected, but considered essential by the crowds). Smashball is only permitted because drawing blood, while beloved by the crowds, is not actually written into the game rules.

"Daddy, calm down," she says to me as she takes a gulp of kaf. I tried to sweeten it to a near syrup consistency. Apparently it worked because she's not complaining about it.

"I am calm." Well, as calm as I can be with my daughter piloting my beloved vehicle.

"I'm not gonna trash your ship."

She gets the clearance to launch. She's rough at first, but compensates nicely and she climbs easily and well.

"Not bad, sweetie," I tell her.

"Quiet! I'm concentrating!"

I'll encourage that. She then reaches angular velocity and leaves orbit nicely.

"When should I make the jump to lightspeed?" she asks.

"When you've entered all your coordinates."

"Okay." She puts them in. I lean over to make sure she's doing it correctly. She gives a tragic sigh of the sort that only young girls can make, but I'd really like to get home in one piece.

We cruise at sublight for a while. The traffic is fairly thin and becomes even more so. You don't go to lightspeed without a clear path, and we don't have one yet. I find myself relaxing a little bit, at least until the signal for jumping to lightspeed sounds.

"Gradually," I tell her. Making the jump is one of the harder tasks pilots perform. You want to do it fast enough that you don't bounce around like crazy, but slow enough that you don't threaten to destroy the ship, contents and crew. It's a sweet spot, and it takes lots of practice to get it right. "Not too slow, not too fast."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know! Fly casual."

She's about to do it. I pray to whatever deities might be present that it goes well.

And it does. It's a pretty nice jump. She could have been a little smoother in the middle, but she's getting it down.

"Not bad," I tell her.

"Thanks, Daddy."

"Want a break?"

"Nope."

That's my girl.


	3. Chapter 3

HOW DO I DRIVE THIS THING?

Chapter 3

(Han)

I'm pleased with how Jaina's done. She's gotten up for the breaks I made her take, and I did have to make her. She hasn't flown enough to know that fatigue often hides until the worst possible moment. She's only gotten the shakes once, and that was last year, when we hit a solar storm and I made her pilot through it. I'm terrible at following my own advice, but that's no excuse not to insist that she follow it.

"We're coming up on Corellia," she says to me. I know this because it's getting pretty big in the window. "Should I raise TC yet?"

"Yeah, you should." I was a little nervous for a moment; I worried that she might forget that timing is everything. But she hasn't, and I think she's done well. Of course, we've hit no obstacles on this part of the run, but that just means we're ahead of schedule a little, and that can count for a lot down the way.

She gives the ship's ID, states the purpose of the visit, and is given instructions as to what trajectory she should follow and on which docking platform she's to land. We'll be in Coronet, which is huge and busy but the traffic controllers here, while not all warm and fuzzy, do their jobs very, very well. There's little turbulence in Corellia's atmosphere, meaning a clean entry. The only time it's bad is when traffic gets ugly and you're circling. Even the most experienced pilots can become disoriented.

"Pull up a little, honey," I tell her. "You're just a little bit too low here. But not a lot; take it slow."

"Like this?"

"Yeah. That's good. Keep heading straight, slow...okay, you're fifteen kilometers out. Line yourself up with the docking platform." Coronet's docking platforms allow some margin of error. It's one of the compensations for the intense traffic that characterizes it.

"I'm gonna land now," Jaina says. I confess to being a little nervous; she hasn't done a particularly soft landing yet. But she's a little bit better on this one. I remember some of my first landings; I'm lucky I didn't get killed.

She cuts the engines and we both let out a long breath.

"How'd I do, Daddy?"

"You did great, honey. You notice I didn't grab for the controls."

"How long do we have to wait to unpack the ship?"

"They don't have a huge shipment, so it won't be long. We just have to wait till they take theirs off and I verify that they didn't take anything that's not theirs, sign off on it, and then, we've got some free time."

"Can I comm Mom?"

"Let's wait till we're off the ship. Reception sucks here."

"Okay."

"After that, how do you feel about traladon steaks at one of my favorite eateries?"

"I'm all over it." She grins and leans over and kisses me. "Are we leaving then or staying overnight?"

"We'll be leaving tonight, so we hit Tralus by morning, but it's not that far, and I'll fly it."

"I can do it."

"We'll see." What I think will happen is she'll eat dinner and it will dawn on her that she's a lot more tired than she thinks she is. But I'll wait for her to arrive at that conclusion, hopefully before I have to carry her. She's twelve and I could carry her if I needed to but my back would make me pay for it. Not something you want to deal with when you've got nine days left on this run.

We hang out for a while, and Jaina is a bit restless. She's still on a high from a successful flight, which is not to be mistaken for the adrenaline rush experienced after surviving dangerous conditions.

"I can't wait to tell my friends!" she says, her fingers itching to comm.

"Text only," I tell her. There're too many varying wave signals to voice comm.

The crew that shows up to unpack the _Falcon_ are guys I know real well. I introduce Jaina to them.

"About time this ship got a real pilot," one of them said, and all four laughed.

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. As a matter of fact, Jaina piloted all the way here today," I brag to them.

"I did," Jaina says with a smile.

"Well, just don't do what your father tells you and you'll be all right."

"You guys are hilarious," I say to them. "So funny, I forgot to laugh." They finish the job in about fifteen minutes; once it's off the ship and we've both signed off the job, our obligations are over.

"Ready for some dinner?" I ask Jaina, giving her shoulders a squeeze.

"I'm starving! Let's go!"

01123581321345589144233377610987

Jaix's is my favorite restaurant on Corellia. The huge traladon is an indulgence I partake of whenever I'm here. Jaina orders a slightly smaller traladon, which is probably wise on her part; I almost never make it completely through the steak (although I have come close). Now if it were Jacen, he could probably mow through two of the giant steaks.

Jaina seems to be text comm'g everyone she knows, and then calls Leia.

"Hey Mom! I piloted all the way here!" I love the enthusiasm in her voice. It really does bring back the thrill. Sometimes it gets to just be a job, but seeing her do it and talking about it takes me back.

"And your father's still in one piece?" I hear Leia joke.

"Yeah, he's good. I didn't try to kill him."

"She thought about it!" I call over, loud enough so that Leia can hear me. I motion to Jaina to hand me the comm.

"Hold on, he wants you," Jaina says, handing me the comm. As I'm talking to Leia, a slew of text comms races in, each pinging an interruption.

"Hey sweetheart, we're at Jaix's."

"I figured. How was the flight?"

"Our little princess did great."

"Excellent. Where's the next stop?"

"Tralus. I'm going to fly us over and then we'll sleep on the _Falcon_ till the load out crew arrives." It's about a four standard hour flight, and easy. "I miss you."

"I miss you, too, Flyboy. And tell our daughter I'm proud of her."

"It's her comm. I think you can tell her yourself."

"Thanks, Mom...love you too...bye." Jaina smiles even more brightly. She and Leia test each other a lot these days. So it's nice to hear her and her mom being pleasant to one another. She continues to text comm her friends and they back.

"This was such a cool day," Jaina says. "I had to tell everyone!"

"Apparently so." Our dinners are served. I ask if Jaix is around. It's Jaix the Third; his grandfather opened the place before I was born, and then his father ran it, and now the third generation's running the joint. And so far, they've kept the quality consistent.

"Yeah, he's in the office, lemme get him," our waiter says to us.

A few minutes later Jaix The Third arrives at our table.

"Hey Solo, who's the beautiful girl?" is his first question.

"The best underaged pilot in the galaxy," I explain to him. Jaina beams. "She flew us in today. Jaix, my daughter Jaina."

Jaina smiles at him. "Hi."

"I've heard a lot about you, but your dad failed to mention how pretty you are."

"Thanks." Jaina rolls her eyes a bit, but I think she knows she's a very pretty girl. Gods know she hears it enough.

"She taking over the family business?" Jaix asks.

"One of these days."

"Need us to make up a tray for Chewie?"

"Chewie's not with us. Family problems at home."

"That's too bad. Save some room for dessert. We've got kavasa tarts."

My favorite. "I'll take as many off your hands as you'd like."

After Jaix leaves the table, Jaina says, "Is there anyplace where you don't know somebody?"

"I'm sure."

"'Cause everywhere we go, you always know someone."

"Occupational hazard."

"Mom says you used to get around a lot when you were young."

"Well, I was smuggling. You go where your paymasters tell you to. Along the way, you make friends and enemies."

"Most everyone seems to think you're cool. Well, not the holotabloid people."

"They deserve to be hated."

"Don't they have anything better to do?"

"They don't think so."

"So why are there so many stupid sentients?"

"Beats the hell outta me, sweetie." She's getting way too meta for me. I'll need another ale.

"You'd think some of them are too stupid to live."

"You'd be amazed."

"So Daddy," she begins between bites of her steak, "did you have girlfriends before you met Mom?"

I did not see that one coming. I almost choke on a mouthful of tubers.

"Is everything all right?" Our server asks us.

"Another Alderaanian ale, stat," I say.

"Well? Did you?"

"Why do you want to know?" I ask.

"Mom says you were the only boyfriend she ever had."

"Uh-huh."

"But you're lots older than Mom."

"I'm only ten years older." Of course, to her, that seems like an eternity.

"You didn't answer my question."

Kids. "I did."

"What were they like?"

"Nowhere as good as Mom."

"Dad, I'm twelve now. I can handle the truth."

My ale appears in that moment. I take a large gulp. I did not bring my daughter to dinner expecting to discuss my previous relationships.

She's staring straight at me.

"Were you in love with any of them?"

"Jaina, sweetie, is there a reason for this?"

"Does there have to be?"

"Honey, I don't consider anything that happened before I met your mom to be important. And I mean that."

"But does that mean you never had another girlfriend?"

I groan. "Yes, I had a few girlfriends."

"Who was your first?"

"Bria Tharen."

Her eyes nearly pop out of her head. "THE Bria Tharen? The one who founded the Rebel Alliance?"

"One and the same."

"Oh my gods. You were her boyfriend? That so rocks!"

"Not really." In fact, not at all. "Jaina, honey, I really like my past life kept in the past."

"She got killed. It's not like she's gonna rat you out or anything."

No, she won't. She just royally screwed me over.

"So like why did she break up with you?"

"Who says I didn't break up with her?"

"I can tell."

I take another sip of my ale. I'm supposed to fly in less than four hours. I used to fly hung over frequently. Not so much now.

"Jaina, when you get older, you won't want your past discussed, either."

"I was...okay, there's this boy in my literature class - "

"Save it for your girlfriends, honey. Dads do not want to hear that their daughters find any male remotely attractive."

"He doesn't even know I exist, anyway."

"I can't help you there."

"Can we get dessert? I love kavasa tarts."

"Sure."

Narrowly escaped with my skin intact on that one. And here I thought the only thing that would be my undoing would be her flight skills.

I totally miscalculated on that one.

01123581321345589144233377610987


	4. Chapter 4

HOW DO I DRIVE THIS THING?

Chapter 4

(Han)

The flight to Tralus was smooth and as I expected, Jaina was exhausted. She complained that she wasn't tired all the way till the time she crashed on one of the small bunks I'd put in for the kids when they were younger. We docked in Tralus overnight, and I managed to get about six hours of sleep, so I was good to go when it was time to head for Drall.

Jaina had been awake before me and actually warmed some flatbread with honey and made kaf. It's about the extent of her culinary skills, but she is only twelve. So I'm mystified as to why she doesn't respond when I call her.

"Come on, General, let's move!" I call to her.

No response.

I head back to the lounge, and she's nowhere to be seen. The 'fresher is locked, but it's not like her to take forever in there.

"Honey, we need to get going," I call to her.

"Okay." She sounds real upset. She didn't seem that way till a while ago.

She comes out, her face streaked with tears. "Daddy, can you leave me alone for a few minutes?"

"Sure, sweetie." I head back to the cockpit. My comm indicates an incoming text. It's from Leia.

"She's having her first period," Leia explains. "I told her where to find my supplies but I don't think I have any pain meds. If you can give her some, I think she'll be okay."

I text her back. "Glad you're prepared on the supply thing, because I'd have no idea where to get them."

"Don't make a big deal out of it. Just give her some pain pills and let her rest for a little while. Cramps are nasty."

"Thanks."

Jaina comes up to the cockpit, still looking unhappy, which is understandable because she appears to be in pain.

"Need some Zopran?" I ask her.

She nods. "Yeah, I think so. I don't feel good, Daddy."

"It's okay. I'll drive for a while. You can rest a little longer."

"Okay." If she's like her mom, a short nap and some pain pills will have her back on her feet in no time.

Trying to look at it from her point of view, this has to be miserable. I would think that it's a confusing time and a time when a girl needs her mom. Being stuck alone with Dad is not optimal right now.

Drall is only six standard hours away, and that's at slightly sublight. A bit trickier than Tralus, but not a lot more. Trickier is going to be Brentaal, which is our next port of call after Drall. We'll probably get some dinner at Drall; there's an excellent seafood place I enjoy. Yes, I do have a favorite restaurant nearly everywhere. The one on Drall isn't like Jaix's; you choose what you want cooked, and they hand it to you with plenty of tubers and vinegar and you walk away with a plastipaper bag filled with greasy goodness. Leia loves the place. I wasn't sure how she'd react when I took her there for the first time, but she raved about it. They deep fry everything till it's got a light brown crispy crust. I know it probably clogs arteries. I don't have it often enough to count is my justification.

We're a little bit ahead of schedule, and while I'm piloting alone, I can make up a lot of time.

It's not two hours later when Jaina arrives in the cockpit. She has color in her face again and she's smiling.

"Can I drive?" she asks me.

"Sure. You might wanna slow down a bit. I've been pushing my old girl a little harder than usual."

"Okay. Daddy, do you have any chocolate on board?"

"No, I don't, but we can pick some up at the marketplace on Drall." I'm trying to keep a straight face; she is totally Leia in this regard. I can tell where she is in her cycle by her chocolate consumption.

"Okay."

I slide over into the right hand seat and let her take the captain's chair after I've put her leg wells in place.

She pilots quietly for a while, her microphones from her music device jammed into her ears. As long as we're in a clear stretch, which we are, I don't mind, but I remind her that she has to take them out when we're about 90 minutes out from our landing point on Drall.

So far, she's doing it well. I'll have her land on Drall and drag her to the seafood place.

As for chocolate, there's a bakery nearby that makes an incredible chocolate cake.

"Daddy, when did you know Mom was 'the one?'" Jaina asks me, making air quotes.

"About half an hour after I met her."

"Daddy, I'm serious!"

"So am I. I said to your Uncle Luke, either I'm going to kill her or I'm starting to like her."

"So why'd you start to like her?"

"Because...she had a lot of fight in her. She was brave and outspoken and very, very funny. Later on, I discovered that she was also very sweet and kind, but that took a little time."

"She says you guys argued for like a year."

"The whole base was watching and listening. At least we gave them something amusing to talk about."

"So when did you know you wanted to marry her?"

"Night of the victory celebration for the Battle of Yavin. Which would not have happened had I not gone back for Uncle Luke."

"That's what Mom says."

"I couldn't let him have all the credit."

She laughs. "Why the victory celebration?"

"Oh, she looked beautiful in her white gown, and she smiled at me and stepped on my feet while we danced and I was like, this is the woman of my dreams."

"So then why'd you fight for so long?"

"Because neither of us wanted to admit to ourselves that we liked each other."

"Mom says you guys had your first kiss inside a space slug. Gross."

"We didn't know it was a space slug until we almost got devoured by it. I was looking for a safe place to land. Hyperdrive was down and we had the Imps all over our asses."

"She said you just floated away with the trash, after you landed on an Imperial star destroyer and then you went to Bespin."

"Not one of our more cheerful memories."

"She says you got frozen in carbonite. What's carbonite?"

"One of my many ideas about what hell is like."

"Mom said Uncle Luke rescued you and her."

"That he did. I'd have been dead meat without him."

"And Mom killed Jabba the Hutt. Uncle Luke told me that, not Mom."

"Your mom is amazing."

"What's a Hutt?"

"An oily, slimy, amoral, unethical, reptiloid life form that only cares about squeezing the most money they can from anyone they can shake down."

"You worked for him, didn't you?"

"I worked for a lotta people I hated, sweetie. But I got kicked out of the Imperial Navy - "

"Wait wait wait! The _Imperial _Navy?"

"Yep."

"You were an Imp?" My daughter seems shocked by this.

"Only for a short time. I wanted a career that involved flying. The Imperial Navy trained for free, and since I didn't have any credits, free was good."

"So why'd you leave?"

"'Cause of your Uncle Chewie."

"Is that why he has a life debt to you?"

"Yep. I was supposed to kill him."

"Kill Uncle Chewie? He's the nicest sentient ever!"

"Yeah, well, the Imps used the Wookiees as slaves. If there's anything that really boils my blood, it's slavery."

"Mom told me that. I mean, the part about how you hate slaving."

"There are a lot of things that are wrong, but everything about slavery is wrong."

"You miss Uncle Chewie? He's the one that usually flies with you."

"Uncle Chewie's a good pilot and a great gunner and yeah, we have a lot of fun together, but I think I like my new copilot just fine."

"Why did you leave the Rebel Army?" she asks me.

"Several reasons. The main one being that I can't stand to salute anyone. I'm not all that well cut out for taking orders."

"Now there's a shock," she says, laughing. "But you take orders from Mom."

"What can I say? She's the boss."

01123581321345589144233377610987

Jaina does a much smoother landing than she did on Corellia. Drall's not densely populated, so the landing pads aren't as plentiful or as large, but there's a lot less traffic to deal with.

"Nice job, sweetie," I tell her. "Ready for some of the best seafood in the galaxy?"

"Do they have anything chocolate?"

"Bakery in the same marketplace. Order the dark chocolate fudge cake. It'll be a party in your mouth."

"Okay." She's yawning; she'll never admit she's tired, but I can tell. Been kind of a major day for her. And not insignficant for me; my only daughter is now on the way to her journey in becoming a woman, and there's nothing in the universe to stop it.

I order the same thing Leia and I always get and I persuade Jaina to give it a shot. It's not strongly flavored, and the crusts on the tubers and the fish are incredibly light and crunchy.

"Daddy?"

"Yes, honey?"

"Can I have some credits, please?"

"You need something?"

"Chocolate cake. And...stuff."

"Sure." I give her some. Leia's stash may not have been as large as I'd imagined. "Get me a slice, too."

"Thanks." I take care of our orders once they're up, and head to the tables scattered throughout the marketplace. A short time later, Jaina's back, balancing a bakery box and carrying a bag from the apothecary. I then realize that my baby girl is in fact not a baby anymore.

"Eat it while it's hot," I advise her.

She bites in, and she closes her eyes and smiles. "How come we can't get fish this good on Coruscant?"

"Because we don't live near the oceans." There's plenty of seafood available, but not in its just caught state. That makes all the difference.

"We're going to Brentaal next, right?"

"That we are."

"Are we flying tonight?"

"I'm debating. We could, but it's a nine hour flight, and I'm thinking we could both use some sleep. How about we crash out when we get back to the ship and wake up in about nine hours, and then we'll hit Brentaal by midday."

"That sounds good."

"Ooh, Kairos is calling." Kairos is Jaina's best friend. "Hey girlfriend, I'm eating dinner with the old man. I'll text you back. Mwah!"

Wow. I actually won out over her best friend. Hard to believe, but I'm very flattered. Of course, what I should be is suspicious that she's going to start in with 20 Questions again.

"Are you ever gonna take me to Shug's?"

"Sorry, sweetie, no time to get to the Outer Rim on this trip. Shug is gone, but his daughter still runs the place. Maybe someday."

"How about Tatooine? We've never been there."

"Uncle Luke ever tell you about it?"

"Some."

"What'd he tell you?"

"It's got two suns, it's hotter than the nine hells, and it's totally boring."

"All true, but it's where Mos Eisley's located. That's where I met your uncle and Ben Kenobi and got sucked into all this." I smile at the memory. "I did have to kill a bounty hunter who was annoying me, but things like that happen all the time there."

"You killed a bounty hunter?" My daughter's eyes grew three sizes that moment. "That's so cool!"

"I had a number of ways to describe it, but cool wasn't one of them," I tell her.

"Was it human?"

"Rodian."

"They're kind of weird looking."

"I wanted to keep its head and mount it on a plaque in the living room, but your mom doesn't like my taste in decorating." We both laugh. "But the one I really wanted was Boba Fett."

"What kind of name is that?" She looks as if I've told her something ridiculous. Which, in fact, I have.

"The name of the worst bounty hunter I ever came across. But he got his. He's currently being devoured by the Saarlac in the Pit of Carkoon."

"Eeuw."

"No one ever deserved it more."

"I hope I never meet one."

"About that, my baby girl, you are correct."

"I'm not a baby."

"I don't care how old you are. You'll always be my baby girl."

I think she's a little annoyed and also secretly happy that she holds that position in my heart.

We finish the fish and Jaina pulls out the bakery box. "How many slices did you buy?" I ask her.

"I couldn't decide. So I bought all of it."


	5. Chapter 5

HOW DO I DRIVE THIS THING?

Chapter 5

(Han)

We have to wait around at Brentaal for longer than I'd hoped, but Jaina and I both woke up around 0300 and started flying. Jaina launched us smoothly. She's really getting her skill set up. And despite the unwelcome arrival of menstruation, she's cheerful and eager to learn more.

Of course, Jaina can only stay quiet for so long, and her idea of a long time is, in fact, amazingly short.

"How come Mon Mothma's so mean to Mom?"

"Mom says it's because she lost everything to the war. Her husband, her son. She misses them very much. War has a way of taking away something from everyone. She lost her loved ones and while I won't lie and say I like her, she sacrificed the most precious things in the world to her. I know that I could never get over losing you, Mom, your brothers, and on most days, your uncle and aunt."

This makes her giggle for a moment, but she turns serious.

"What did the war take from Mom?"

"Alderaan. Friends. Sleep. Peace of mind."

"What'd it take from you?"

I think. "Friends. Sleep. Six months frozen in carbonite. Almost lost your mom a few times."

"She says you always rescued her."

"She rescued me, too."

"I hope there's never another war."

"I hope not, either. That's why I tell you kids not to be soldiers, smugglers or Sith."

"It was scary in the war, wasn't it?"

"Always. We had a hard time in the war, and it went on for years. But that was nothing compared to founding the Republic. That was even harder."

"I hope the Republic stays forever. They talk about the war at school and how bad the Emperor was to everyone."

"He wasn't exactly a nice guy."

"But was he as bad as Darth Vader?"

That name jolts me. It's been years since I heard it. I still have a hard time connecting him to the fact that he's her biological father.

"Darth Vader...his real name is Anakin Skywalker. I think it was hard for your mom to accept. I don't blame her. She still has no love for him, but I think naming your brother that was her way of saying that that name means something else now."

"Well, he's Anakin Solo, not Anakin Skywalker."

"True."

"Anakin's so funny. He takes everything easy. Me, I wanna be able to do that sometimes but I'm just not that way."

"You're pretty intense. But that's good, too."

"Jacen and I used to be so close. But now, it's like we're not alike at all."

"That's mostly because of your age. You and Jacen'll be close again."

"But when?"

"I can't answer that. I think you'll find someday you had more in common than you think you do right now."

"Maybe when we get to go to Praxeum. How old do we have to be to go?"

"Your mom and I think fifteen is a reasonable age."

"But why?"

"Because before you start working with the Force, we'd like you to have the chance to be kids first. Uncle Luke may not have had an ideal life - and he didn't - but he was nineteen when he started, and he's very powerful."

"But he doesn't act like he's powerful."

"Which is exactly why he is. I was an officer in the Alliance military for three years, and I found that the best way to get everyone to do what they needed to do was to laugh with 'em, not to take myself too seriously, and then, they'd want to do it. But I didn't see myself as a general when the war was over. I did what I needed to do, and I was ready to be a civilian, start my own business, and I found out in the Alliance that I really liked training pilots, so I began to do that as well."

"I'm guessing Mom was always gonna work for the Republic."

"That's what her life was all about. And it's a good system. Not flawless, but life's a lot better than it was under the Emperor. She's responsible for a lot of that."

"I know, and I think that's cool. Although sometimes I wish she was around a little more."

"Same here. But she's a major player, and I'd never ask her not to be unless she didn't want to be anymore. The galaxy'd be an even bigger mess without her. There's still outbreaks of violence and some planets that did well as part of the Empire don't like the New Republic. Your mom's really good at getting everyone to work together. Me, on the other hand, would have shot all of them five minutes after we got there."

She laughs. "You know what's bad, Daddy? I can see you so doing it!" It's amazing what amuses my kids.

Her comm's been pinging for the last hour. "Better go answer your friends," I tell her after we've flown about four hours. We're almost halfway there.

She doesn't argue with me, but she doesn't take forever to get her friends covered; she's back in less than an hour.

"Time for you to take a break," Jaina informs me. "I want some breakfast."

"I knew there had to be a reason."

"How about if we eat more of the cake?"

Normally, Leia and I don't let the kids start the day in a sugar rush, but believe me, I've eaten far worse things in flight. "Sure."

"And can you get me some kaf?"

"Yes, your Highnessness," I bow to her. "Anything else?"

"No, that's okay for now. I'll let you know if I need anything else."

She winks at me and I swear I'm looking in the mirror.

01123581321345589144233377610987

I text comm Leia as I'm preparing breakfast for Her Highnessness. Leia texts back, "you're calling her THAT?"

"Would you prefer that I call only you that?"

"Don't give her any ideas is all I'm saying."

"Too late." Leia will always be my princess, and Jaina my little princess. They'll just have to deal with it.

We discuss the boys, the pets, the apartment that's still a mess, we need a cleaning droid or 500, what bills need paying, how work is going for her, how Jaina is faring with the newest part of her life, all the usual bookkeeping that's part of being a family. It's not the glamor part, but I've discovered that I take a lot of comfort in the fact that life as a family has its mundane features. It keeps the drama level down. Not that we don't have drama - come on, we've got four kids - but we're not on the run from this Imp cruiser or that bounty hunter, and we're not being threatened with death every time we turn around.

I like it.

Twenty years ago, if you'd told me I'd end up being Mr. Domesticated, I'd have ruptured my internal organs from laughing so hard. Now, it's the most important thing in the entire universe.

Don't get me wrong, I love flying, it's what I do and I'm good at it. It's just that I have other priorities these days.

Finally, the load out crew at Brentaal arrives. Nothing like being three hours late, although I confess that we arrived a little early.

We're about to take off again when Leia pings me.

Our next port is Esseles. Leia informs me that the pro-Imperial factions and the pro-Republic factions are having civil disturbances, which is diplomat language for rioting. She advises getting out of there as soon as we can drop their shipment.

Dammit. And I was going to introduce Jaina to the best pancakes in the galaxy.

I find the lack of pancakes to be disturbing. And we're going to need supplies at some point, but despite having good shops near the docking bays, we're not going to be able to do it as Esseles. Apparently there are problems with ships entering and leaving the system as well as on the ground. I contracted to deliver the goods, however, and we're gonna have to get moving.

"Jaina, sweetie, I'm going to take the flight to Esseles," I tell her.

She looks affronted. "What? You don't like my flying?"

"No, I think your flying is coming along nicely. But there're problems on Esseles."

"Is the atmosphere hard to enter?"

"No. But there's problems on the ground, riots and such."

"Oh." She thinks about that. "But we're not gonna stick around, right?"

"No. We'll make the delivery and leave. What I'm most worried about is if they've taken their grievances out of the atmosphere." I really feel that being shot at while flying is not something my daughter should have to contend with. She pilots well but she's never trained as a gunner. It's hard to do both jobs at once. I've done it, and don't want to do it again.

"You can fly for a while," I tell her. "I've got to get the guns ready in case we're attacked. I hope we're not, but things have a way of getting crazy." And believe me, I know from crazy.

"Can you show me some evasive maneuvers?"

"Guns first. Evasive maneuvers second. Right now you're in free space, so you should be okay."

"Okay." She looks worried but my girl is not about to let a little thing like fear get in her way.

She's my daughter, all right.


	6. Chapter 6

HOW DO I DRIVE THIS THING?

Chapter 6

I charge up the guns as quickly as possible. I then head back to the cockpit, where Jaina continues to pilot. It's peaceful for the moment. That's not to say it couldn't change in the next minute or two. The deflector shields are at full power; I don't leave home without it. I don't want to engage them unless I absolutely have to; they're gigantic power pigs.

"How're you doing there, sweetie?" I ask her as I take my place in the copilot's seat.

"It's quiet right now. So can I practice some evasive maneuvers?"

This question is more complicated than it looks. If we look aggressive, we might be attacked. We can work on defensive maneuvers, but some of them are really tricky.

"What you want to remember is to stay above your attackers," I tell her. "You can usually buy a few seconds' time to tell if more ships are forming an attack pattern or if it's just one lone idiot."

"Nothing's on our scopes yet, Daddy."

"I know, little princess. You can keep flying. But keep your eyes open."

"No, I'm just gonna let the ship fly itself!" She rolls her eyes at me. Pure Leia. The old girl does have autopilot, but I keep it for emergencies, such as when I'm traveling alone and eventually have to get to the kitchen and the 'fresher.

I'm restlessly watching the maps and glancing all around me. There's nothing in this area, but we'll be in the shipping lanes soon. There aren't many problems at lightspeed in open space, but you get into the shipping lanes, and if someone's so inclined, the hostilities might be getting off the ground.

"Why is everybody having riots?"

"Well, when the Empire fell and the New Republic was created, there were people who wanted the old ways back."

"Why? They were bad!"

"A few very wealthy people benefited from the laws of the Empire."

"And everyone else?"

"Got screwed. But what's interesting is that there were people who got screwed under the Empire but still didn't want the New Republic."

"I don't get it."

"I don't, either, but change is always scary for some people. And people in positions of power can sometimes convince those not as well off that they can only benefit under the old regime."

"That's retarded."

"No one ever went broke betting on the stupidity of sentients."

"Do you think they'll shoot us?"

"I don't think so, but we'll learn more as we get closer." Time to hit the news. I can get both civilian and military channels, but I try not to use either.

I can tell Jaina is nervous. She's concentrating on her course and being very quiet.

"You're fine, honey."

"I wanna try some evasive action."

"We're getting close to the shipping lanes. Let's wait till we leave."

"But what if someone tries to get us in the shipping lanes?"

"I'll drive."

"But who's gonna shoot back?"

"You may not believe this, but I can multitask."

"Just show me a couple, okay?"

"All right. Let's say you have someone approaching from starboard and they're over us."

"Okay."

"What's the first thing you'd do?"

"Raise the deflector shields?"

"Very good. You want to slip out and get over them."

"Like this?"

My life flashes before my eyes. I can't look. And then...

She completes it beautifully. No father ever held his breath for longer.

"Can I try one more?"

"We're going to have to enter the shipping lanes in seventeen minutes. So what do you do when you have fighter escorts?"

"Uh..."

"You have to find a way to fall out of their formation."

"I'm not sure, Daddy."

"Okay, just fly. I'm gonna take over in a few minutes."

"No, let me do it."

"I think we need more of a theoretical basis on maneuvers first. Which we can discuss once we're out of here."

Jaina just nods, not happily.

"Let me take over," I tell her.

"No, Daddy. I can't learn anything if you're always taking over."

I don't like it, especially if Leia's news of local trouble on Brentaal is correct, and it is. Leia won't tell me anything till she's got confirmation.

"What are the coordinates for the shipping lane?" I ask her.

"You gave 'em to me. I'm putting it in the nav."

"If this gets too weird for you, you tell me."

"I will, Daddy, I will! I'm trying to concentrate!"

Properly chastened, I keep a watch on things.

She eases into the shipping lane. Not bad for a beginner. Nothing that looks threatening nearby.

Suddenly, we feel a bump and it's coming from the port side.

"Let me take over!" I say to Jaina.

"No, tell me what to do! You have to shoot back!"

"Raise deflector shields!"

"Okay, okay, I'm doing it." She is scared out of her wits, and I would very much prefer that I be in control. "Deflector shields up."

A voice comes over one of the channels. "Stay on your course. Do not make changes to your course."

"I'm not!" Jaina shouts back.

"Identify yourself."

"YT-1300, the _Millennium Falcon,_ making a delivery of - what are delivering, Daddy?"

"Food manufacturing hardware."

"Yeah, food manufacturing hardware."

"What is your name?"

"I'm Jaina Solo." Her voice is shaking. "I'm with my dad."

I look out through the canopy window, and I've got fighter escorts on either side of me. They haven't shot at us again, at least. Fuckers.

"Your surname is familiar. You wouldn't be related to Han Solo, would you?" The tone is decidedly not friendly.

"He's my dad."

Another bump to the rear, but at least shields are up. The problem is, we can't keep them up indefinitely. They're massive power hogs.

"What is your landing code?"

"Uh...okay, my dad's gonna give it to you."

I read it out.

"Continue to your docking bay."

The fighter escorts aren't leaving us alone, but I think we can lower shields.

"Shut 'em down," I tell my daughter, who's scared out of her mind, but somehow is managing to keep her cool. She's so much like Leia in that way. She's now lining up with the docking platform, and slows her speed gradually, as if she's done this all her life.

She doesn't land particularly well, but I think we can overlook that.

Once she's on the ground, she doesn't move, doesn't speak.

"Jaina? Honey?" I put my arm around her. "It's okay. You're safe. You did it."

And suddenly, she bursts into tears.

"That was pretty scary," I tell her. "You did great." No question about it, she did very well.

She cries for a few more minutes and my shirt becomes sodden. I hold her and let her go through it.

A few minutes later, she stops, takes a deep breath, but doesn't let go of me.

"You did great, sweetie."

"Daddy, I was so scared!"

"You get someone shooting at you, you start to look at the inside of your head in a whole new way."

"I'm such a wimp."

"Oh, honey, please, you're anything but. You really kept your nerves steady, and if you decide you still wanna be a pilot, that's important."

"But why did I start crying then?"

"Well, you had to keep it together while you landed. It's nerves is what it is." Granted, on a scale of one through ten, that was around a four, but she's twelve and an inexperienced pilot. "I can't tell you how many times I've gotten the shakes after something really harrowing."

"I'm not gonna cry after every flight," she says stubbornly.

"No, you won't. You'll get more experienced, and you and your ship get to know each other as you get there."

"How come you're never afraid?"

"Jaina, sweetie, anyone who says they're never afraid is lying to you. I've been scared many times. Ask your mom if you don't believe me."

She finally lets go of me. "Mom says you're the bravest person she knows."

"Yeah, but it's not because I'm never afraid."

"Can we get off the ship after they get their stuff?"

"Not here, no. Your mom says there's problems down here and that's the last thing we need. We'll make the drop and get the hell outta here."

"I'm glad I bought the whole chocolate cake, then."

"You know, chocolate cake sounds really good about now."

01123581321345589144233377610987

I make some kaf for us and we sit down for a snack. The load out crew is late, of course (there are things you can count on), and so we just eat and relax. Whatever happened out there certainly didn't impair Jaina's appetite; she's on her second generous portion of cake.

"Want me to take the run to Gerrard Five?" I ask her.

She narrows her eyes at me. "Are you kidding? I've gotta get a lot better at this!"

She sounds just like Leia when she says it.

"If we get shot at again, let me take over," I say to her.

"I don't think so, Daddy."

"Who died and made you captain?"

She glares at me. "What part of 'I don't think so' are you having problems with?"

"All right, all right."

I comm Leia and inform her of what went on.

"Han, she's your daughter. Why are you so surprised that she's so stubborn?" Leia actually sounds amused.

"Well, I shouldn't be, considering you're her mother."

That makes Leia laugh. I swear, I live with the two most stubborn women in the galaxy and I make them laugh.

I guess that's better than nothing.

Jaina and start mapping out our course for Gerrard Five.


	7. Chapter 7

HOW DO I DRIVE THIS THING?

Chapter 7

The load out crew seems to be delayed longer than usual, which of course always happen when you want to get out of somewhere in a hurry.

"When are they gonna get here?" Jaina grumbles.

"I'll comm 'em soon if they don't. Take a break, honey."

She groans. "Okay. But don't start flying without me."

"I wouldn't dream of it, little princess."

I go over the bills of lading for our deliveries thus far. The Corellian system was clean, easy and relatively quick. I flip to the news; apparently there are civil disturbances going on around us, so better to stay aboard. I recheck the coordinates Jaina's set up for Gerrard 5. They're in order.

I check on Jaina, and she's sleeping. I think that entry took more out of her than she thought it would. Right now, we're going nowhere, so just as well.

I think about the first time I held her. She smelled new, and her skin was so soft, her hair dark and silky, and she had a voice that could wake the dead. I remember thinking how fragile and how stong she was at the same time. I was completely exhausted by the time the twins were born, but in every holo, I'm wearing this goofy new parent grin. Leia was even more tired, seeing as she had to do the actual work of bringing them into the world, but the smile's always there. I remember the sweet little baby noises they'd make, their tiny fingers curled around mine. It amazed me that these were tiny people in their own right, people Leia and I had created from our love for each other.

I don't love my sons any less, and the thrill of holding a new life was there with them, too, but there's something about daughters that melts your heart, when you're not ready to kill them.

I'm ready to comm the load out supervisor when I hear them approaching. Finally.

"Solo!" I hear someone shout, and all of a sudden, the hairs at the back of my neck stand on end.

I'd know that voice anywhere.

It's my cousin, Thrackan Sal-Solo.

WTF is he doing here?

"Sorry, you've got the wrong ship," I call back out. I draw my blaster. I'd had enough of his abuse for the short time I'd lived with him and late, unlamented, batshit insane mother. I'm not doing it again. It's been over 25 years since I've seen him and it hasn't been long enough.

"I'm afraid I don't." He's near the aft hold. He makes so much as a twitch, and he's going to look like someone barfed up their dinner.

The scary part is, he looks like me. Okay, he's fatter and greyer, but there's an unfortunate strong resemblance.

"Where are the gems?" he demands.

WTF? Nobody said anything about gems. "You definitely have the wrong ship."

"You're a lousy liar. I don't know how you've kept smuggling for so long."

"I'm outta the smuggling business, have been for years. And the one person I'd never do it for happens to be you." Okay, him and a few bounty hunters. "Here's the bill of lading." I show it to him. "Sorry, no gems. Now would you be so kind as to get your fucking sorry ass off my ship, 'cause the offload crew's approaching - four hours late, I might add, and I want to get the hell out of here in a hurry."

He turns to the crew, which is all composed of what he'd consider to be 'lesser' species. Thrackan is about as racist as they come.

"Daddy, what's going on?" Ah fuck. I didn't want Jaina to hear this.

"Jaina, go back to your bunk," I tell her though clenched teeth.

"I'd heard you'd had children. I was hoping it was just a horrible rumor," Thrackan said, as if he was the sort who lifted his pinky from the rest of his hands while drinking a hot beverage.

"You're stupid," Jaina says to him, and turns on her heel.

"And she has your charming personality."

"Don't forget my good looks. Look, I don't know anything about gems. I don't deal in smuggled goods. I was requested to deliver the food manufacturing equipment, and that's what I'm delivering. Now get the fuck outta here and don't show your ugly face to me ever again."

"You stole them," Thrackan points a finger at me.

"I don't think so. Now scram. Let the guys do the load out already." I keep my blaster trained on him, and he returns the favor.

Aren't relatives wonderful?

We've got four admittedly ugly sentients for a load out crew, and it makes me sick how my cousin talks at them. And if he's looking for contraband gems, well, they're either buried in what I picked up or he's trying to hit up each ship as it comes in to find them.

And then it hits me: WTF is he doing here on Brentaal?

Maybe the Corellians got sick of him and booted his ugly ass off the planet.

Once the good are loaded out, I tell Jaina to get us out of here. She stomps on it, a little harder than she should, but it's not as if I gave her any lead time.

"That guy's your cousin?" Jaina asks in disbelief.

"Sadly, yes. I went to visit him and his mother back when I was a teenager. I wanted information about my family - I don't really remember my mother and father - and I finally got it out of him, but I got beaten up by him daily and then he would do things like stick me in a closet for three days and slip only bread and water under the door. Now you see why I prefer most of the Skywalker side of the family."

"I hope we never see him again. I was kinda hoping you'd shoot first."

"If I ever see him again, you can believe I'll shoot first."

"Do you think he was the one that shot at us?"

"Maybe." It makes sense.

"You said he's from Corellia like you are. So why's he here?"

"I have no idea and I don't want to know."

"But what if he follows us again?"

"We'll blow his ship up."

I see a smile spreading over her face. That's my daughter.

01123581321345589144233377610987

The flight to Gerrard Five is a long one, about eleven hours long. We land without incident. We're both exhausted. I decide that we're going to take a break tonight; we made up some of the time heading out for Gerrard, and I could really use a comfortable bed and a hot water shower. I do have a hot water one on the _Falcon_, but I want one I can languish under that makes my joints less creaky and a bed that's a lot more comfortable than the bunk in my quarters.

"Let's stay someplace nice tonight," I tell Jaina. "I know a decent hotel and it's got a cafe, nothing fancy about the cafe, but the beds are comfortable and you can take a shower all night if you want."

"Okay."

"You did good on this run, sweetie."

"Thanks. I was so scared going to Brentaal."

"You weren't the only one, little princess."

"I wanna know who hit us."

"I don't know."

"I think it was your stupid cousin."

"I'm not sure. He was never a good pilot." Although admittedly it's been a while since I tried to teach him to fly.

"Maybe he's got somebody that flies for him."

"Jaina, sweetie, my cousin is up there with my past relationships and your present ones. I'd prefer not to talk about him."

"Okay. Sorry."

I'm thinking along the lines of what she is, but I want her to keep her mind on flying, not my miscreant relatives. I'm already dreaming of a soft bed with back support and fluffy pillows, something dopey on the holovision that Jaina and I can laugh at as we crash.

I send a quick comm to Leia on a secure channel and ask her what's up with my horrible cousin. I also let her know we're safe and that we're going to spend the night in a decent hotel.

My favorite one is Dans Les Nuages, which translates to 'in the clouds.' I've stayed there once with Leia, and we...never mind, that's none of your business. Don't you see that children are present?

We get a hovercab and head to the hotel. It's something of an aging dowager, but it's a very high class dowager. The entire lobby is white travertine, not unlike the room Leia and I were married in. It's got a swimming pool, a jet spa, one bar and one cafe. You wouldn't make a special trip to go to the cafe, but everything I've had there in the past was tasty and filling.

"This is great!" Jaina says to me as she eyeballs the lobby. I check us in, and the desk clerk smiles as she tells us to enjoy our stay. I don't think that's going to be a problem.

It's not even close to dinner time and we did kill the cake. Jaina wants to go in the spa jet tub but she hasn't brought any swimwear.

I go back to the desk clerk, and she directs me to a local store by the name of Better With Water. It's pricey, and I'm appalled at what it costs to buy Jaina a bikini with hardly any fabric, but I think it'd be fun to go into the water as well. I grab a suit; I have one at home. Actually, that's not true. I have two. Leia refuses to throw out this skimpy one that she claims I look so hot in. I know better. The other one's more comfortable and provides more coverage, but it's older than the twins. I pick out a pair of black jams, which have more fabric and cost less than Jaina's.

The pool is beautiful. I've swum here before. I don't remember learning how to swim, but I've always been able to, as far back as I can remember. Jaina, thanks to both residences she's lived in, has been swimming like a fish since she was three. When you live in a climate where you can live in the water for 75 percent of the year, it provides opportunities for developing that skill. Even Jarik's getting the hang of it.

I decide I'm gonna catch some rays while Jaina dives into the pool. If she splashes me, she is going to be very, very dead. The afternoon is warm, pleasantly so, as opposed to the furnace level heat provided by Coruscant at this time of day. I bring my datapad with me, not for work, but to catch up on the comics and the smugglers' blogs. (Most of us don't smuggle anymore; we were legitimized. It's better but sometimes we miss the good old days.) There's usually information available that you can't get via other channels.

There's chatter about my cousin. Apparently he's been shaking down what can be identified as New Republic ships for 'gems.' The blather indicates that he's got this speciest movement starting up. Six non human species were killed when his guards began searching their ships.

"Wonder why he came alone to my ship," I comment.

"You're related." The next seven replies consist of this sentiment.

I think about offering a bounty, but realized I don't care enough about the bastard to part with money. I type that in, and I tell anyone who wants to hunt him down and make him a lot more scarce - as in permanently scarce - is welcome to it. I make sure to tell them that I'm staying at the Dans Les Nuages. Actually, more like bragging about it. You can do well with a cargo business, but you can also go bust. So when you do well, you get to 'inspire' your fellow travelers with stories of room service and a nice pool, knowing that some of them are staying in some of the crummiest lodging in the entire galaxy.

I've had plenty of flophouses and pay by the hour joints in my past.

"Did you bring The Princess?" Gree, whose screen name is UnrequitedSex490, of course wants to know.

My screen name happens to be OnceUponAVykk34, a hat tip to my first experiences as a professional pilot. I was going to use OnceUponAPrincess but there were loud objections voiced by my lovely wife. She's got a good sense of humor, but that was apparently crossing the line.

And it doesn't matter, because when I get home, I'll be upon the princess more than once. I refuse to share that sentiment. Nor do I indicate that my daughter is with me. There's just some info you don't share. My kids are not fair game.

I sign off with the rowdies, who've informed me that there's a sabacc tournament on Illodia when I get there, assuming nothing goes wrong, and I might play a little and let Jaina have some time...

I look up, and my daughter is talking to a...BOY!

"Jaina, get over here!"

I hear her say to the boy, who looks about her age or maybe a little older, "excuse me, my dad is having a spazz." She swims over to me. "What?" She demands in a voice I recognize as my own.

"Why are you talking to that boy?"

"Because you're boring." She swims away towards her new found 'friend.'

She is quick on her feet, I'll give her that.

Until she was about eight, I used to pick her up in the water and toss her all the time. She's tiny like Leia, but she's not as light as she used to be and I'm not as young as I used to be. She'd scream and then make me do it again, over and over, until I pleaded for mercy.

I miss that.


	8. Chapter 8

HOW DO I DRIVE THIS THING?

Chapter 8

We have sandwiches at the cafe, an Alderaanian ale for me, a blue moon shake for Jaina. She looks a bit tired, which is good, because I'm really tired. I have no plans to do anything other than fall into bed, turn on some idiot holoprogram, and crash. She ties up the shower for way too long, but it's fine; I'll get mine in the morning.

I actually did get to swim a little, but she and I sat in the jet spa tub, which really unkinks me. We were talking about the beach vacations we go on every so often, and how much fun we had, and how we need to do it again soon. I agree. I just have to get Leia to take some time.

"Jarik'll love it." Jarik is two now, and he's probably a terrible two, but I've gotten so used to kids that it doesn't make me crazy. Or we're just not paying enough attention. He loves the pool in our complex, especially the waterfall. I'll take him in the water with me, and he'll laugh and splash, and the moment I begin to take him out, he lets out screams that would wake the dead, five solar systems away. A beach vacation would be great. And then there's Leia's and my fourteenth anniversary coming up. I need to get busy on that. We always go away for our anniversary. That's sacrosanct. Mon Mothma be damned.

She comes out, dressed in her pajamas that are printed in wild pinks and purples with what appears to be a pittin on the front of the shirt. Her hair's still wet but she has it wrapped in a towel, and jumps into her bed.

"Your turn, Daddy."

"I'll wait till morning." There might even be some hot water by then. I'm flipping the remote through the holochannels. Gods, what a craptastic selection.

"These are like the most comfortable beds ever."

"Don't get too used to it. Next time you sleep, it'll be your bunk."

"I know, but this is way awesome."

I finally settle on some space opera, the perfect choice for those with no functional brain cells left. Jaina's already conked out. I might have seen ten minutes of it before I did the same. Actually, I was watching my little girl. She may not be that little anymore, but she will forever be my little girl. She looks innocent as the day she was born.

If only she could stop growing, just for a while. Say a few years. Like fifty of them.

01123581321345589144233377610987

We're late getting up, so we grab some breakfast to go, buy some supplies from the local Grab-it, an overpriced grocery catering to flyboys and girls and only stays in business because of its convenient location and massive choices of kaf, snacks, beverages, and an ale and wine section second to none. Pru, the owner, has listened to us bitch about her extortionate prices forever; she sucks on her hookah and tells us good luck on finding her selection anywhere else - in this solar system. She has a point.

We stock up and Jaina takes the _Falcon_ to the blackness of the galaxy. The view never ceases to amaze me. Billions of diamonds of varying sizes dotting the galaxy, like the crystals on Leia's dark blue cocktail dress (I like that dress, because she can get out of it easily. Oh, and it shows off her curves in a way that's probably illegal in at least a dozen worlds. There's more than one way to suffer when you're at yet another state dinner or visiting dignitary's reception of the wedding of a boring bureaucrat, and there's one way to relieve that suffering, other than at the bar).

Oh, great. Now I'm fantasizing about my wife in her blue cocktail dress...and out of it.

Leia is a deadly weapon. She might be small, but oh my gods, she's got the curves, the voice, and she knows all my happy places.

Speaking of which, I should check in with her about what's up with Thrackan. I never want to see his sorry ass again, and I'd like to know something about his travels.

I ping her. "Hey hotshot, miss me?" she asks teasingly as she sits at her work desk. She's got a mountain of datapads stacked and the stack never gets any shorter.

"You have no idea."

"How's our pilot?"

"She's piloting well. I could get used to being in the copilot's chair."

"Hi Mom!" she calls out to Leia.

Leia laughs at me. "I know you better than that, Flyboy. You'd asked me about Thrackan Sal Solo."

"I just wanna make sure he's out of our way for the rest of the trip." Illodia, our next port of call, is a nice planet. I'd hate for him to turn up there.

"Well, he's been a very busy boy." We're on a secure channel. I need to tell Jaina not to repeat this. With my kids, you're better off warning them first; they got both the Solo and Skywalker mouths, so everyone knows that they are not exactly the souls of discretion when it comes to repeating stuff.

I take the comm and tell Jaina to go to lightspeed in five minutes.

"You ever heard of the Human League?"

"Is that a new jizz band?"

"Very funny. No, as you know, your cousin has founded an underground organization by that name. And he's allied himself - quietly, I might add - with the Sacorrian Triad."

"I thought those guys were defunct years ago."

"They've changed some, instead of being more pro-Imperial, they've grown even more humanocentric. It's pretty typical of fringe political movements - mostly young, underemployed or unemployed males. There are women but they're a small minority, primarily regarded for breeding purposes."

"And I thought I was bad when I was young. All I did was drink, gamble and smuggle."

Leia laughs at me. "They appear to fund themselves by stolen goods. Not the sort you find in your average pawn shop; these are rare and precious jewels that they mostly trade in. They have other species hunt down and capture these jewels, and then they're shot to death, being of no further use. Thrackan, it would appear, hates loose ends."

"That may be the only thing we have in common."

"You're on Illodia as your next port?"

"Yep, that's where we're going. Jaina should be making the jump to lightspeed any minute now."

"The last we heard was that he was on Brentaal, but it appears he's heading for Centrepoint Station."

Best guarded place in the galaxy after Coruscant. "Yeah, well, good luck with that one."

"I don't think he'll bother you on this leg of the trip, but you're not the first ship that's been shaken down, although you are the first to have Thrackan himself do the shaking."

"Daddy!" I hear a loud voice from the cockpit and a familiar twang of engines that should go to lightspeed, but don't. Fuck!

"Gotta go, sweetheart. I'll call you later and ask what you're wearing."

01123581321345589144233377610987

I hate it when this happens!

At least this time, we're not being chased, but I need Jaina to set autopilot and help me.

"You really gotta do something about that hyperdrive, Daddy."

"It's fine, it's just temperamental." The _Falcon _is a fine lady, but she has her moments. This just happens to be one of them. It's not as nervewracking as it can be when we used to be chased all the time, but it's annoying as hell.

The first thing that pisses me off is that I discover that my tools are either missing or misplaced. It takes several minutes to find them, and it's either Jaina or Anakin who's the guilty party. More likely Anakin - he's not as organized as his older sister, and because she's older, I've yelled at her more times.

"I did NOT move your tools," Jaina informs me defensively.

"I didn't say you did."

"Ani never puts back anything where he found it."

"Hmm. What about the times you took the microcooker apart?"

"Oh, Daddy, I was only eight, and I wanted to see how it worked!"

I instruct her what tools to hand me, and where to hold things. She drops her hand and we have to start over again.

"Maybe you should use standard parts," she says to me.

I glare at her. "When I want your opinion on how to fix my ship, I'll beat it out of you."

She's properly silenced now. It takes almost an hour, but the good grey lady is purring after we make the jump. Illodia is a decent enough planet, but not somewhere we're going to stick around. I know I've been there, but I'm pretty sure it was long ago and I was drunk. I've had a lot of experiences like that in the past.

"Are you gonna play sabacc with your friends?" Jaina asks me.

"Not planning to, no."

"You like sabacc."

"If I took you to a sabacc game, your mother would pull out my hair piece by piece until I was bald."

"Why?"

"You're not old enough to be in a casino and that's where we usually play."

"But I could, you know, stay on the ship and guard her."

"Sweetie, I like traveling with you. I'm perfectly willing to give up sabacc for one night, and no, you cannot stay here and guard the ship by yourself."

"So get me a room. Like the one we stayed at."

"Rooms above the casinos are expensive, and we're now running behind schedule. You're in the cargo business, you've got schedules to keep and Chewie and I just nap on and off."

"I think it could be cool. I mean, it's been cool so far!"

"Well, I happen to really like the girl in the pilot's chair."

I get a smile. "Maybe someday I'll take over your business. Once I become a great pilot, that is."

"You're on your way, sweetie."

"You think so?"

"You've done great this trip."

"I hope we don't get another solar storm this time."

"I hope not, either, but you've done it once before, you can do it again."

"I was scared."

"You'll be fine. The only thing about this leg of the trip is that getting into Illodian orbit is really difficult because of its gravity well. And we have to stay at lightspeed for as long as possible."

"Okay, okay, just let me fly."

Someday, she'll say that again to me, and it'll mean, I'm gone, Daddy.

I hope I can deal with it when the time comes.


	9. Chapter 9

HOW DO I DRIVE THIS THING?

Chapter 9

We're trying to make up time and it's been looking like it'll happen. I go down to make some kaf and make some sandwiches for us when I hear the ship shudder. I almost lose my footing and run towards the cockpit.

"Daddy! Get up here!" Jaina sounds really frightened.

I see it. It's an asteroid field.

"Okay, sweetie, this time, you have to let me take the controls." We swap out places quickly. "Watch and learn." This is probably not the time to tell her that it's been like fifteen years since I've done this.

I have to go to sublight in order to manage this. I reverse throttle the engines and once again, we see the twinkle of stars and the hunks of rock that threaten to pulverize my ship. At least this time, no TIE fighters are chasing me.

"We're not gonna get stuck in a space slug, are we?" Jaina asks me anxiously.

"I'm not planning on it." I need to concentrate. We could probably avoid the asteroids, but I'd have to go a large distance and set us back further on time. I'm going to get my old girl through this. We're bumped more than a few times till I get my bearings.

Jaina is very quiet. Seeing as she's not piloting, this can only mean one thing: abject terror. Right now, I can't worry about that. My only objective here is to get the ship - and us - through this, preferably in one piece.

Navigating an asteroid field is the sole province of the insane and in that regard, I believe I qualify. For some reason, I didn't remember it being this bad, but I was younger and even crazier then.

For over two hours, I navigate the ship through a dizzying array of maneuvers. Jaina is keeping it together, although there's no way she's not terrified.

Finally, we're out. I have to say that I never considered flying through asteroids to be something I'd have wanted to repeat.

"And that's how you do it," I say to Jaina. "You okay?" We've been through some stomach clutching maneuvers.

"I'm fine." She did let out a huge breath once we were clear of the asteroids, right along with mine. "Can I drive now?"

"Sure. Start the jump to lightspeed."

We really have to make up for lost time now. You try to build in extra time in case of emergencies, and I have, but if we're going to get everything to everyone on time, we gotta hustle. We've had the hyperdrive go once already. Not that that's unusual.

Jaina's at the controls again and doing a pretty admirable job. There're some strong solar winds on the weather front coming up, but I think she'll manage all right. I've gotta say that it's pretty gratifying to teach my baby girl how to pilot. I had hoped one of my kids would enjoy it.

"We've got solar winds ahead," I tell her.

"Okay. What do you do?"

"I just power on through 'em." There are instances where you'd slow down, but solar winds are just like a stiff breeze; they can become cyclonic but it's unusual. The trip'll be bumpy but fast. Jaina's got steely nerves, though. Kid impresses the hell outta me.

We only have four more stops and then it's back to Coruscant. I'll be happy to be in my own bed, getting trampled on by my sons, making love to my wife, watching smashball while drinking an ale and my boots off.

These days with my daughter have been some of the best days of my life. Okay, there was the encounter with Thrackan the Asshole, and it stupid and turned away. But just the fun of sharing a journey with her, getting to enjoy a good chunk of time with her, finding out what kind of person she is and wants to be - how do you put a price on that? You can't. Even if we're late on a couple deliveries, so what.

I hope that Leia and I are doing right by our kids. We have three Jedi kids, and my greatest hope is that they can channel that into helping in the best ways they know how. Hey, even a loser like me managed to find something bigger and better than myself, and the Force isn't even on my side. Or maybe it is. That's not a question I can answer and right now, it's just my daughter and me.


	10. Chapter 10

HOW DO I DRIVE THIS THING?

Chapert 10

The rest of the trip we spend hustling to stay as close to schedule as possible. Once through the asteroid field, the rest of the trip is fairly smooth. We do hit another solar storm as we close in on Jumus, but Jaina had it under control. Humbarine, Gyndine, J't p'tan, easy stop and drops; we got their merchandise unloaded and left immediately. I'm momentarily tempted to say we'll stay on Haariden overnight, because it's a beautiful planet, but the place has meaning for Leia and me. It's not that my daughter isn't worth it, but I'm planning to take Leia there for our next anniversary.

Our last drop is at Danoor. We're exhausted, naturally, and by then I consider staying a night and flying at morning, but even Jaina's had enough by then. We're both ready to return to squabbling siblings, an overworked mother and wife, and an apartment that's a total disaster.

"I'm glad I got to go with you, Daddy," Jaina says to me as she prepares to make the jump to lightspeed.

"I'm glad you did, too." I give her a squeeze on her shoulder. "Wanna do it again sometime?"

"Yeah! But I'm really tired, Daddy. I can't wait to sleep in my own bed."

"I know the feeling." Right now, I am imagining Leia in her glorious nakedness, the touch of her hands, the warmth of her lips, her legs wrapped around me, her body moving in perfect rhythm with mine. I want to cover her in kisses, feel her soft skin against mine, her fingers running through my chest hair.

"Y'know, I'm sorta starting to miss my brothers," she confesses.

She'll be over that after a few hours, I'm sure. But I can see it. I'm missing my sons, can't wait to hassle them, to play Grand Theft Starship and Smugglers' Run with them, to hold Jarik in my lap, to look at how much they've probably grown in the last ten days. I'm looking forward to playing music with Jacen, having Anakin talk about new ways to jack up the performance on the _Falcon's_ deflector shields without losing so much power (his hypotheses have all been wrong so far, but I'm sure he's going to hit gold one day), hold Jarik on my lap and read him 'The Little Lost Bantha Cub.' Each of my kids is a very different person, and I'm determined that they stay that way.

One of my big worries about them being Force sensitive is that it would dilute each of the three older kids' individuality, and that makes me more than a bit squeamish. Luke's gotten more relaxed with being a Jedi in terms of having other things in his life, but it will always be the core of his existence.

I realize my worries may be ridiculous, but when it comes to my kids, I don't want anyone deciding their fates. We've told them they can't be soldiers, smugglers or Sith. I don't think those are unfair limitations, and leaves the field wide open for them to do many things in their lives.

"So you think you might still want to go into business with your old man when you get older?" I ask Jaina.

She smiles at me. "I might have to do other things first, but yeah, I think I wanna take over when you get too old to fly."

"I'll never be too old to fly," I tell her.

"Yeah, Daddy, someday, you will."

"How old are we talking here?"

"Oh, I dunno. 70 or 80, maybe."

"Get back to me then." We both laugh. We're joking around, but there may come a point where I really can't do this anymore, hence my eagerness for Jaina to take over the business.

It sends me back to a question I was asked long ago. I think it was on a night when I was really drunk (there was a lot of that in my smugglng days). Someone, I can't remember who, asked me if my life meant anything if no one is able to remember it.

Maybe that's why, when I met Leia, I knew almost immediately that I desperately wanted children, and I wanted her to be the mother of those children. We created four of these magical and unique babies.

From the moment I met Jaina, I knew she would affect me in the way only daughters can. I'd heard of daddy's girls but never understood it till I met her, pink and crying and soft and smelling so new (that changed quickly, but when she first came out, I can't even describe how fantastic it was).

She's twelve now, almost a teenager, and there's more unknown territory.

"Daddy," she says to me.

"Yes, sweetie?"

"How come you never talk about when you were growing up?"

"Because it was lousy."

"Some things had to be good."

"Not many, baby girl. Not many. There was Dewlanna."

"Who was she? Your girlfriend?"

"Oh my gods, no. Dewlanna was the cook on the ship where I spent most of my life till I was eighteen. She was a Wookiee, but she raised me as if I was her own. She was always kind to me, sneaking me extra food, comforting me when I'd been beaten to a pulp."

"They used to beat you?" Her young eyes register horror.

"A lot. The captain of the ship was a sadist, a cruel person who liked watching others suffer."

She looks puzzled. "That's so messed up."

"Yeah, well, the only thing I learned to do well was to steal. I hated doing it. I really wanted to be legit. That's why I wanted to join the Imperial Navy. I wanted to fly, I wanted to be respectable. I wanted to not wonder when I'd eat again, where I'd sleep, hell, when I could take a shower."

"That sucked."

"In two words, yeah. It sucked."

"So that's why there's no pictures of you as a kid?"

"Nope. And really, honey, I don't know if you can understand this, but my real life, the one I was learning to take pride in, was when I met your mom and Uncle Luke."

"Mom said she was taken prisoner by her own father. That's major messed up."

"Well, let's just say Darth Vader wasn't exactly who I had in mind for a father in law. Fortunately, he died before that happened."

"So why did Mommy name Anakin, you know, Anakin?"

"I think it was because it was her way of saying, this is gonna be different. I don't love my father, but I won't let him have a role in my life. I'll name a son Anakin and he can transform it. That was her way of thinking."

"She says you named me after your mom. But I thought you didn't have a mom."

"Well, everyone's got a mom, as you've probably learned in biology, but she was killed or disappeared before I could remember her. She and my father."

"How'd you find out about her?"

"From that horrible cousin of mine."

"You believe him?"

"I went through whatever archives existed and he was correct about it."

"He's such a creep, though. You don't wanna be related to him."

"I can't not be related to him, but I can choose to not have a relationship with him. And I did choose that, and still do."

"But you had Dewlanna."

"Yeah. Dewlanna died protecting me. Shrike, that was the captain's name, he was going to kill me. But he killed her because she protected me. And she saved all her credits and gave them to me so that I could start a better life."

"I bet she'd be proud of you now."

"She'd be happy that I'd finally found my way in life. Which would never have happened if old Kenobi and Uncle Luke hadn't walked into the cantina where I usually hung out when I was between jobs."

"You're lucky they wanted you."

"I didn't think so for a while. Wasn't easy. But I fell hard for your mom."

"About half an hour after you met her," Jaina finishes for me.

"I asked your Uncle Luke, do you think a princess and a guy like me, and he said no, without letting me finish my question."

"I don't think you had to finish your question."

"No, obviously not. He said it so fast, I knew I had to pursue her." I smile at the memory. "Meeting your mom made me rethink everything."

"What'd she make you think about most?"

"What I was gonna do with the rest of my life. What I wanted. What I needed. Before I met your mom, if someone told me I would love being a dad, I'd have ruptured all my internal organs from laughing so hard. But that all changed with her. I wanted to be married, to have a home. I wanted a family to love."

She gives me a grin that she totally gets from me. "So how's that working for you?"

"I'll let you know after we get home," I tell her, teasing her. "Okay, sweetie, let's get ready to go into orbit. Coruscant's getting pretty big in the window."

"Can I do it?"

"Sure. Just remember that it's bumpy going in."

"Just like when you met Mom."

"Yeah, just like that."

"And then it was really pretty."

"Exactly. Okay, little princess. Let's go home."


End file.
